Sara, you have a great ability to put the toughest things into simple words! It is easy to point at problems. It is much harder to find and implement solutions. Solutions require hard work and collective effort.
Well written, just one question: Can you show me several (let's say 6) instances where 'engaging in conversations') has actually changed majority opinion?
I contend, it has not changed opinions on race, gender, guns, drugs, pre-marital sex or any other unwarranted ideation or behavior.
This is a good question. I can't show you 6 off the top of my head but I'll see if I can find more examples than the one that I can provide below.
There's a man named Darryl Davis. Some people call him the "Nazi whisperer." He is a black man who, back in the 90s, began having conversations with white supremacists, members of the KKK, and Nazis, with the goal of asking "Why do you hate me when you don't even know me." He went into every conversation without any goal: there was no attempt to convert, convince, condemn, or anything that might put the other person on their back foot. He wanted to connect and understand, and where he could (and only if he felt he had earned their trust) he gently pushed back on misinterpretations of historical events or media stories.
Over time, some of the people became his friend—all while maintaining their memberships. Over MORE time, many of these people began to question their beliefs and allegiances. I don't know the exact number and he doesn't boast, but in 30 years of this work, he has been mailed over 300 (I believe) pieces of klan or nazi paraphernalia when members ultimately decide to stop engaging with these groups as a result of his conversations and friendship.
I just co-edited his book, which will be re-released in November. It's FASCINATING and humanizes "the other" of Nazis and racists. In some ways it is heartbreaking. But his patient work is the ultimate testimony to being willing to engage—even with people who might be tempted to kill or hurt him.
And to your point... on a mass scale, no, these conversations have not changed majority opinion or the existence of groups oriented toward hate. But I don't believe you change things en masse. You change things as you can, which is often one by one.
Sara, you have a great ability to put the toughest things into simple words! It is easy to point at problems. It is much harder to find and implement solutions. Solutions require hard work and collective effort.
Thanks Joey! Agreed. Solutions that last do require hard work, especially when the path to those solutions require us to manage our own emotions.
Well written, just one question: Can you show me several (let's say 6) instances where 'engaging in conversations') has actually changed majority opinion?
I contend, it has not changed opinions on race, gender, guns, drugs, pre-marital sex or any other unwarranted ideation or behavior.
This is a good question. I can't show you 6 off the top of my head but I'll see if I can find more examples than the one that I can provide below.
There's a man named Darryl Davis. Some people call him the "Nazi whisperer." He is a black man who, back in the 90s, began having conversations with white supremacists, members of the KKK, and Nazis, with the goal of asking "Why do you hate me when you don't even know me." He went into every conversation without any goal: there was no attempt to convert, convince, condemn, or anything that might put the other person on their back foot. He wanted to connect and understand, and where he could (and only if he felt he had earned their trust) he gently pushed back on misinterpretations of historical events or media stories.
Over time, some of the people became his friend—all while maintaining their memberships. Over MORE time, many of these people began to question their beliefs and allegiances. I don't know the exact number and he doesn't boast, but in 30 years of this work, he has been mailed over 300 (I believe) pieces of klan or nazi paraphernalia when members ultimately decide to stop engaging with these groups as a result of his conversations and friendship.
I just co-edited his book, which will be re-released in November. It's FASCINATING and humanizes "the other" of Nazis and racists. In some ways it is heartbreaking. But his patient work is the ultimate testimony to being willing to engage—even with people who might be tempted to kill or hurt him.
And to your point... on a mass scale, no, these conversations have not changed majority opinion or the existence of groups oriented toward hate. But I don't believe you change things en masse. You change things as you can, which is often one by one.
A great example! And also a very long timeframe.
Yeah. A lifetime commitment.
a lifetime well spent!