Joy Chose You

a poem by Donna Ashworth

Photo by MI PHAM on Unsplash

A note from Sara: Lately, I’ve been thinking about how we tend to think of joy as something to be achieved after we have conquered all the beasts, climbed all of the mountains, and taken care of all of the loose ends. We treat it as if it is somewhat like the top triangle of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, only available to us after we surpass all of the other levels first. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy; if we think that way, we believe we can only experience joy after we’ve [fill in the blank]… achieved, accomplished, and hit the goal.

I’ve watched my friends do this, and I’ve done it myself… we turn away from joy because maybe life is hard at that moment, and maybe some part of us can’t handle it or thinks we don’t deserve it or haven’t earned it yet. It might even feel indecent, completely out of turn, like dancing when you’re miserable or laughing at a funeral. That’s why this poem resonated so much. I don’t think that’s how life really works. We can’t put joy off and wait for some perfect moment in our lives. Who's to say she’ll return after we’ve turned her away so often? When joy chooses to “slither through the imperfect cracks of your life,” let her in.

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Joy does not arrive with a fanfare

on a red carpet strewn

with the flowers of a perfect life

joy sneaks in

as you pour a cup of coffee

watching the sun

hit your favourite tree

just right

and you usher joy away

because you are not ready for her

your house is not as it should be

for such a distinguished guest

but joy, you see

cares nothing for your messy home

or your bank balance

or your waistline

joy is supposed to slither through

the cracks of your imperfect life

that’s how joy works

you can not truly invite her

you can only be ready

when she appears

and hug her with meaning

because in this very moment

joy chose you.

— A poem by Donna Ashworth